A month behind!

Hello spankos! I apologize for being so neglectful. J and I have been running crazy, which is always the case this time of year for us. It starts right before Thanksgiving and continues through the New Year.

I am still getting my regular spankings and maintaining my to do list (barely), but we have been more relaxed about our rules. There just isn't time to be strict.

I did manage to start a new book called Power Exchange by Madeleine Oh.

I've only had a chance to read the first few pages, but so far it seems like a good read.

The back of the book reads:

Mark has found the perfect woman - a born submissive. Nothing is more exciting than the subjugation of an independent woman, but Mark soon discovers that while he can control desires of the flesh he cannot control desires of the heart.

Annie’s lover reveals to her a most intriguing side to his personality, a lifestyle she is drawn to that is both fascinating and intimidating. She is about to learn more about her lover and his wishes, and about herself and her latent desires.

You can get it at Amazon, if you're interested.
The ISBN is 978-1-843605-70-6.

Spanking with a Bath Brush

I was cleaning the bathrooms today and it got me thinking about a story I once read.

The husband was very particular about cleanliness and neatness. The wife was good at cleaning, but often left her cleaning brushes and sprays out on the counter. The husband requested she put the supplies back where they belong after cleaning. She claimed the scrub brushes needed to dry before she could put them away. The husband agreed, but said by the end of the night they should be dry enough to be stored away under the sink.

After having the same conversation a few times, the husband tells her to buy a scrubber brush next time she is at the store. He informs her that his plan is to spank her with it next time she leaves the cleaning supplies out. He was tired of telling her over and over.

His story ends with him saying he has spanked her only once so far with the scrubby brush and she hated it, but she has remembered to put the brushes and sprays back in their place every time since then.

Does anyone here have an arrangement like that? Have you ever gotten spanked with a bath brush?

Back to the spanking schedule

J feels that I've been motivated and progressing well toward my goals each day, so we are back to 3 reminder spankings a week. He spanked me extra hard on Monday, to be sure I'd be thinking about it until Wednesday. I have been gradually feeling more motivated. The more things I can accomplish, the more motivated I feel. I don't know why I need to be spanked, but when I don't have those consequences I slack off immediately!

We've also been working on my submission, which I've mentioned before. Often J is very lenient and gives me many chances to do what he says. It's pretty common that I will hem and haw and he will say "Do you want your pussy spanked?" And I will say no, and we will go back and forth like that until I eventually do as I'm told.

But over the weekend, I got a glimpse of a much more strict J. He asked me to show him my tits. I hesitated for a second and he very calmly grabbed my hand and let me into the bedroom. Without a word he laid me back on the bed, took off my pants and proceeded to spank my pussy with his hand. He switched over to the ruler and spanked for probably 5 straight minutes without stopping! He reminded me that I asked to be punished when I did not comply with what he was telling me to do. He asked me several times if I understood and agreed. Of course I did. The pussy spanking didn't last very long, but it was hard and fast. When he was done, he told me to come into the office. I was allowed to put my pants back on, but no shirt. J placed me on a stool next to his desk, in sort of a time-out for 10 minutes while we talked about our agreement. He had his hands on my tits during the whole lecture. I was not allowed a shirt until the next morning.

Spanking week 2

J decided this week was going to be a repeat of last week, as far as spankings go. He says I'm doing great with getting my to-do list completed, but thinks I'm still not quite as motivated as I should be. And I agree. He also upped by bedtime, just by 15 minutes for now, to help me get moving a bit earlier in the day.

So I will be spanked every day this week, plus pussy spanked 3 times, and immediately after I will give J a blow job. He says after this week if I'm back to being as motivated as I need to be, we can resume our old schedule of 3 reminder spankings a week.

We are also working on my level of sexual submission to J. I want to get back to the point where my body is available to him whenever he wants it. I used to always be game for sex, but now I just feel old and fat. I find that when the choice is made for me, I can get past any grumpy feelings I might be having and get right to the fun parts.

Over the weekend, J presented me with a pacifier that has a penis as the rubber part that goes in your mouth. We don't get into the age play scene, but as part of my submission, J will sometimes treat me like a child.

Today he told me I was to place the pacifier in my mouth before I left the house and keep it there anytime I was in the car. Of course no one can see the penis part when it's in my mouth, but they can still see a grown woman with a pacifier in her mouth! And it's not easy to hide - it's got a big, baby blue, plastic ring. Here is a picture of it:

I drove with it all the way to the Post Office and back with it securely in my mouth, and it seems like I hit every red light and a lot of traffic.

I feel like everyone saw me.

I don't even know what they thought.

4 Days of Spankings, so far

My ass is very sore from being spanked 4 days in a row. I have one more day of spanking tomorrow and then J will decide how we will proceed next week. The spankings have increased in intensity throughout the week, so I'm looking forward to the break this weekend.

I have been getting my to do lists done, but it's been a struggle; I'm just barely motivated, and find myself having to rush to get things done before I have to be in bed.

It has been nice having everything finished each day. I can go to bed knowing the house is clean and I can start the next day fresh, without anything hanging over my head.

After my spankings, J has been sending me to the corner. I am supposed to think about how these reminder spankings are keeping me motivated, and all the reasons we choose to live this way. I have a really hard time with that. My mind wanders almost instantly. And I end up thinking about everything except for what I'm supposed to be thinking about.

I have one more pussy spanking left tomorrow. That hasn't been too bad, because I've been getting a 1 day break in between. The last one for the week is tomorrow, and it'll probably be the most severe of the week, since J will want the reminder to stick with me until the next time I get a pussy spanking.

J texted me in the middle of the day today and told me to masturbate. At first I felt like I didn't have time, but it turned out to be a welcome break in my day. And who doesn't like having orgasms? lol.

I see J embracing his role again, and it makes me proud and happy to know that he's so comfortable and natural doing what's best for us.

Back to our Spanking Routine, day 1

Promptly at 6pm, J instructed me to go to the bedroom and take off my clothes. He had already arranged many of our implements on the bed. He was clearly ready to start back up with our version of DD.

Once I was face down, J started with a brief lecture. He reminded me that I am to stay motivated to achieve my daily goals and complete my daily to do list. And if I do not, there will be consequences. He started spanking me gently, due to my not having been consistently spanked for several months. He continued the lecture saying that when he holds me accountable, he finds that he is more motivated and holds himself at a higher standard. So it is very important that we stay on track.

He also reminded me that whining will not be tolerated. If I whine, J will make sure to find something else for me to do with my mouth (with an option to also spank me).

J increased the speed and intensity of the spanking, and repeated the lecture a few more times. My ass was definitely sensitive and I was squirming and fussing. At one point J used his hand to spank me really quickly one right after the other on one cheek, and then the same on the other cheek. It made me feel a bit like a child; that's usually the way I imagine a parent spanking their kid. But I guess if I act like a child by whining, I should be treated like one.

Once J decided I had enough for the first day, he repeated the lecture and asked me if I understood (yes). I counted the last 10 swats out loud.

J then positioned me on my back, across his lap, where he had good access to my pussy. He went over my original agreement with him to never deny him sexually, unless I was ill or injured. Some people may think that might be extreme, but it really works for us. J is not demanding, and anytime I'm not in the mood, but I say yes anyway, it ends up being enjoyable and I'm glad I didn't turn him down.

He then proceeded to spank my pussy with his hand, a leather strap, and a wooden ruler he sanded down smooth, just for this purpose. He also spent some time playing with my clit. He would rub it for a few seconds and then spank it for a few seconds. It really hurts when he spanks my clit, but J always seems to know just how much I can take.

When my pussy was sufficiently pink, I was sent to the corner to think about the spankings I had just received and the reason for them.

After standing in the corner for about 10 minutes, J called me to him. He already had a pillow waiting for me (how nice!). He guided me down to my knees and placed his rock hard cock in my mouth. He also positioned a full length mirror next to us, because he wanted to watch. I tried to put on a good show for him.

I took a quick shower to rinse all the cum off of me and refresh myself. I get so tired after a spanking.

Back on Schedule

So J told me today that it was time for me to get back on a schedule.

"What kind of schedule?"

He started with "6pm spanking"

I waited for him to say Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, because that was our schedule before.

But he continued with "every day."

Then he added, "We have a lot of catching up to do."

Eek! But he's right, I do need to get back on a regular schedule. Not just with spanking, but with everything else in my life, too. We got so busy this summer and got far away from schedules and rituals. I've been a total slacker with chores and daily tasks that need to be done.

I just can't seem to be productive unless I know there are definite consequences. Lucky for me, J is willing to provide those consequences.

We also agreed (long ago) that I would submit to J sexually. Anytime I "don't feel like it", J reminds me of our agreement. And every time, I'm glad I was reminded because I always enjoy it and feel happy that we did it. That may sound weird to some people, but it's just how I'm wired. (And I always have veto power over the whole thing if it's not working for me.)

J also added that to get me used to our arrangement, I'll be performing orally on him every day following my spanking.

I feel like J is more than ready to step back into his role of expecting me to do what I say I'm going to do, and providing the consequences when I don't. He can be strict sometimes, but it works for us.

I don't know if he's going to incorporate things like corner time, bedtimes, and other punishments back in. I expect he will. It feels like I haven't stood in a corner for eons. J didn't specifically mention pussy spankings either, but I think it's assumed that they will be resuming, as well.

I see so many relationships falling apart all around me, but J and I remain strong. I think a lot of it has to do with our version of DD. A lot of my friends don't seem to communicate very well with their spouses. J and I communicate clearly and openly all the time, and I attribute much of that to our version of DD.

I'm happy we found something that works great for us, even if we do stray away from it sometimes.

Some spanking humor

Spanking at the beach

We have some friends with a beach house and they often invite us to go with them. This time the way our schedules worked out, we would be arriving one day before them and have to leave a day earlier.

I didn't know but J had packed a paddle and a strap. We got there on a Wednesday, which is a usual spanking day. But we have gotten so far off of our normal schedule this summer that I wasn't even thinking about it.

Until J said, "Take your clothes off and bend over the bed."

I saw him get the strap out, followed by one of our small paddles. J said since we had an extra day to ourselves, and some rare downtime he wanted to take full advantage of it. Plus he said I could always use the reminder.

It was a mild spanking, which I was glad about. I wasn't sure I could take much, since my ass is out of practice. J was sure to remind me that even though I wasn't getting spanked regularly I should still do things I know I need to do and not get impatient with people and treat them rudely, or anything like that. It's definitely much harder to be bitchy when my ass is on fire!

After that J put the paddle & strap away and we enjoyed a rare day of total relaxation and fun with no commitments to anyone or anything, just each other.

Just a picture for now

I hate that I have been neglecting this blog. I just have not had any time to devote to it lately. And with J being gone so much we have been neglecting each other as well.

Since I have a spare second tonight, I thought I would stop in and say hi very quickly.

Hi. (very quickly).

I'll leave you with this picture I found somewhere on the Internet. I think it's super cute.

Face Slapping

Awhile ago I started commenting on an article I saved. As I've mentioned, I do not know the origin of this article, so if any of it sounds familiar to you, please send me a message or leave me a comment.

***

One topic the Article Guy (AG) discusses is Face Slapping.

AG says he does not use face slapping regularly with his wife, but he did find it effective in the beginning of their DD relationship. He says when he does utilize it, he never slaps hard, it's more about the submission than causing any pain. He advises not to slap much harder than how you would pat a baby's back. You can "do it a few times to really get her attention". He says to be careful of the cheek bone and to stick with the fleshy parts of the cheek. AG noticed his wife became instantly submissive when he would slap her face.

With his wife kneeling in front of him AG "cups my wife's chin and make her look at me. I slap her cheeks and scold her at the same time."

AG says his wife finds this very humbling.

I can see how it would be.

J slaps my face sometimes. It's always when I'm in a submissive state, like during a weekly pussy spanking. He never has and never would do it in anger. We both agree that would be crossing a line. He's never slapped me hard, it's more startling and attention-getting than anything else.

Next time I need to be scolded, maybe J will try AG's kneeling technique.

So how do you feel about face slapping?

I need to be spanked!

I hate saying those words. But it's true. There hasn't been a spanking here in weeks. And for once, it's not because one of us didn't want to. It's been a timing issue.

There was a training class in a nearby city that J might have had to been a part of. It was looking like he wasn't going to have to go, but at the last minute he was told he was needed. It's not far, only about an hour and a half drive each way, so he is home every night. But with 3 hours of extra driving time and 9 hours of training, he mostly just eats and sleeps when he is home.

He's been going for 3 weeks and has another 3 to go.

We'll both be glad when it's over. J commented last night how quickly we fall out of the routine when it gets disturbed. I know that I so easily slipped back into total laziness. I haven't been getting anything done, which is how I know I need to be spanked.

Although, I'm sure 4 weeks from now, after my ass is nice and red, I will be complaining that I don't want to be spanked. ha. ha.

4th of July fireworks

J and I decided to stay home and create our own fireworks on the 4th. We usually go to the park downtown, but they were expecting rain and huge crowds, so we decided to skip it. Instead we made a bunch of snacks, rented some movies, and got a bottle of wine.

We were laying on the couch, neither of us wearing much. J nodded toward his dick and said, "Why don't you get your head down there right now?" He said it in a half playful, half serious way.

When I hesitated, he flipped me over on my back and gave my pussy a few quick slaps that stung. That got me motivated. I took him in my mouth and put on a performance for him that went back and forth between sexy and silly, which fit the mood perfectly.

Later J looked at me and said, "I want you to cum. Right now."

I protested, "I can't cum on cue!"

He told me to try. So I started masturbating furiously as he spanked my pussy. He kept saying "cum now".

I didn't cum instantly, but it was probably quicker than ever before. And I think I may have seen some fireworks behind my eyes.

We restarted the movie we had been watching, refilled our wine glasses, and cuddled for the rest of the night. Way better than the fireworks in the park!

Consistent Spankings

I have this exfoliating scrubby thing in the shower that I like to use once or twice a week.

It used to be that I'd use the scrubby thing when there were going to be multiple days between my spankings. The surface is rough and it hurts when I rub it across my freshly spanked ass.

But now, since I get spanked three times a week, there is no more multiple days between spankings. So I've been having to exfoliating on my freshly spanked ass a couple of times a week. Not fun.

Even though J and I have have been running a million different directions these past few weeks, he has made sure not to miss any of our spanking appointments. It's pretty much the only thing that's been consistent around here.

I think he might be taking those times to get out some frustration, as well, because lately he's been using more and more implements at one time and the spankings seem to be lasting a lot longer.

I've been keeping up with my list very well, so I haven't been punished for quite some time. And J has been pleased with my level of motivation.

I have been getting my weekly pussy spankings, but other than that we haven't worked very much on my submission. There just hasn't been time.

We did get some potentially good news this week. There is a house a few miles from us that J and I are in love with. We got to see the inside of it once and we both wanted to buy it. Unfortunately it's not for sale. However, a friend of a friend, who is a real estate agent, told them he was contacted by the owners of that house, and that they are thinking of moving into a retirement place, closer to their children. Right now the owners say they are only gathering information to see what they could get for their house, and aren't making any definitely plans. But I think it's pretty likely they will have to move at some point. So we had our friend pass our information along to the agent, letting him know that no matter when these people decide to sell, we are interested. So we might be moving to our dream house at some point in the not so distant future. We are both so excited about the possibility.

Do Not Disturb! Spanking in Progress!

J wants to get one of these and hang it on our front door during my reminder spankings. I somehow don't think our neighbors would appreciate it. Maybe we'll just get one for the bedroom door. Anyone know where I can get one of these?

Oragami

I saw this picture today on Failblog. Stuff that looks X-rated but doesn't intend to be, always makes me laugh.

http://failblog.org/2010/06/21/epic-fail-photos-oragami-fail/

Nothing new, still pantsless

There hasn't been too much excitement here lately. J has been working a lot and I have been spring cleaning and organizing and getting rid of things we no longer need.

My weekly spankings have been consistent and typical, if there is such a thing. But there hasn't been a lot of extra time for playing.

I have been wearing a lot less pants lately, though. J has kept me pantsless for most of the past week. The only exceptions have been when I needed to leave the house, and even some of those trips I was only permitted a skirt with nothing underneath. It's kind of thrilling.

Being naked from the waist down gives J lots of easy access to those parts of me. His hands seem to be all over me all the time, which feels nice and is so sexy! So even with very little free time, we still make time to connect, even if it's brief. Sometimes it's just a quick swat on my ass, other times he plays with my pussy, which has been sopping wet for the entire week.

I'm hoping we will have more time for some fun adventures in the upcoming weeks.

There's a cock on the sink

J has definitely been in the mood to play. Tonight started out with him telling me to put on my pink skirt with the mesh (it's see through), and my black sheer shirt. He followed me around the house as I made dinner and washed the dishes, playing with and spanking my ass and tits.

After dinner J leaned me back on the couch and told me to wait. He returned with the rubber cock from my cock gag and a cyberskin dildo. He stuck the gag in my mouth and the dildo in my pussy. He spent a few minutes fucking my face with the gag, then turned his attention to my now dripping pussy. He spanked me in a playful way and fucked me with the dildo. He commanded me to suck on the gag and told me to imagine it was real. J commented about how hot it was to see me getting violated by a dildo and gag. I came in minutes, my whole body convulsing.

I was then led to the bedroom. J threw me on the bed, face first, lifted my skirt and fucked me from behind. He reached around and spanked my pussy until he came.

After we cleaned up ourselves, and our toys, I giggled as I noticed there was a cock sitting on our sink. I thought it would make an interesting picture.

This is the cock from the cock gag that I was sucking on.

My pants have been taken from me

So I'm sitting here with just a shirt on. J came home from work tonight, and immediately asked to see my pussy. I shaved today, so I'm freshly bald. As he was inspecting me, he gave me a few stingy swats on my clit. He then spent some time pinching my clit between my lips, using his thumbs. Ouch!

I can tell J is ready to get fully back into the swing of things. We've been a little lax lately; we've both been busy and tired. It's hard to keep our appointments when we're stressed out.

I always have mixed feelings about that. It's so easy for me to slip back into laziness. It's so comfortable and nice there. So I think to myself, I really don't want J to be strict with me. But then I get mad at myself for wasting a day and not doing anything. And I think to myself, J really needs to be strict with me.

It's not just laziness with myself, I get lazy and neglect J's needs as well. And I hate when I do that. So I'm craving a spanking, but also dreading it at the same time.

J had some work to do in the garage, and when he comes back in, he'll be spanking me. It's a reminder day. I'm not looking forward to the act itself, but I am looking forward to the motivation boost.

I don't know if J's planning on spanking my pussy tonight as well. It's not our normal reminder day for it, but I haven't been exactly jumping at the chance to please him lately, so I feel like I'm due a punishment in that area. There are times when I think to myself, "I should definitely be spanked for that." Of course I never say that out loud!

J made a comment last night about me needing some training. I sometimes makes things hard on him and I really don't mean to. I know there are days when I could easily take his mind off of work and stress and calm him down, but I don't. It's due to pure laziness. As much as training sounds scary, J might have a point.

He also brought up the fact that we don't play with our toys enough. We have a whole box full of them. I don't know exactly what he has in mind, but I'm sure I'll find out soon enough!

Also last night, we found a skirt for me to wear on car rides (or wherever else J wants me to wear it). It's a wrap around skirt, so it'll allow for easy access. J tells me the skirt is to remain open anytime I am wearing it in the car, and of course I won't be wearing anything underneath. We are going to try to take a short road trip this weekend to try it out. He mentioned getting on the highway so that "truckers will be able to look down and see you." [gulp].

Unmotivated

J and I were discussing how unmotivated I've been the past several weeks. He says it's because he hasn't been as focused on my behavior or my reminder spankings. I say it's just because I get lazy. It's just so easy to slip back into old habits of slacking off and not getting anything done.

We were again short on time tonight, but J did give me a thorough spanking. He used the riding crop first. He uses the end for a stingy effect and the long part for a cane-type effect.

I call that little wooden paddle the Popsicle paddle, because that's what it looks like. J made that out of some scrap wood he had in the garage a few years ago. It's light, but it stings! And since it's not huge it concentrates the sting to a small area. J must have spanked me with that for an hour! Or at least that's what it felt like. It was probably closer to 10 minutes.

I know we both have several projects coming up, and as usual J is busy with work, but we are trying not to get too far from our spanking routine. It really does make things easier and better, even if it is time consuming.

Nearly Naked in the car

Some friends of ours are away and we've been going over every night to get their mail, water their plants, pick up the paper, that sort of thing. Well tonight, J informed me that I'd be getting spanked at their house. I didn't see him pack any paddles in the car, so I didn't know at all what he had planned.

Once we picked up the mail and watered the outside flowers, J told me to go into their living room and take my pants off. While I was doing that, J seemed to be wandering around the house, looking for something. When he returned to the living room he was carrying a very thick yard stick that he found in our friends' utility room.

He bent me over the arm of the couch and gave me 7 or 8 really hard swats with the yard stick. It hurt more than I thought it would. I didn't realize how heavy the thing was. J reminded me that I have repeatedly told him I want to finish my to do list every day. And that I agreed there would be consequences when I don't.

He put the yard stick on the floor and sat in the middle of the couch. I bent over his lap and got my reminder spanking. It didn't last as long as normal, but it was more intense with quicker and harder swats. J didn't take any breaks. He just used his hand but it stung just as much as some of our implements.

It was weird being in someone else's house, in a different room than I'm normally in. It was a little bit scary and a little bit exciting. We did not stay there for very long after the spanking.

We went back out to our car and J told me to take off my bra and unbutton my shirt. I did as I was told, but wasn't sure where this was going. I sat in the passenger seat and put my seatbelt on. J made sure my shirt was fully open. It was dark, so I didn't feel too exposed. He spent the first few minutes of the drive rubbing my boobs and pinching my nipples. I was then instructed to unbutton my pants and rub my clit. But J told me not to cum. The drive between our friends' house and ours is about 15 minutes. It was a struggle to rub my clit for that long without cumming.

When we came to the first big intersection with a traffic light, I commented how bright it was. The light was red and other cars were stopping all around us. I tried to slink further down in the seat, but I could still see the reflection of my naked boob in the car window and side mirror. I'm pretty sure other people could too. I was a little bit nervous about that, but I was mostly focused on my clit by that point.

J mentioned that when we go to our friends' tomorrow he wants me to wear a skirt. He also said that we should get me a "driving outfit" which I'm sure would involve a skirt and some sort of tiny, easily accessible, or see-through shirt.

When we pulled into our driveway, J told me I could button my pants, but to leave my shirt open. I was pretty sure no one could see me, but as I stood under the porch light, I couldn't help but feel very visible.

Once we were safely inside, J removed the rest of my clothes and led me to the bedroom where I was finally allowed to cum. I am still topless and I likely will remain so until tomorrow.

Punishment vs. Play spanking

I took today's topic from the Submissive Journal Prompt website:

http://www.submissiveguide.com/journalprompts/

How do you know the difference and respond to a punishment spanking and one received during play?

The difference is easy. J tells me when I have earned a punishment, but also he is firm and definitely serious. There is no mistake when he is playing and when he's not. When we're playing the mood is lighter and it's fun. Punishments are never fun.

My response varies in that I am more serious when I'm being punished; I know it's not a joke. And I am usually wishing I had not done the thing that has earned me a spanking.

I don't really get punished very often. The reminder spankings I get 3 times a week seem to keep me out of trouble most of the time. Although there are some days, like today, where I know that I am absolutely not going to get to one of the things on my to do list. I'm about 99% sure I'll be getting a punishment spanking tomorrow in addition to my reminder spanking (eek!).

Bald Pussy

I shaved my pussy today and right afterwards, I texted J to tell him. I knew he'd appreciate the information. He texted me back telling me to strip from the waist down and that he'd be home shortly for lunch.

When he got home he examined my bald pussy and told me how nice it looked. He sat me on the couch and told me to masturbate. As I did he swatted my pussy with the back of his hand. We were right in front of a window. No one can really see in, but it still felt like I was exposed. The combination of those things made me cum in mere minutes.

There was not enough time for me to give J the same pleasure, before he had to go back to work. But I imagine that will be happening later tonight.

There's gonna be a spanking tonight

I'm sitting here dreading the spanking I know I'll be getting today. But at the same time I know I need it. My motivation level is zero.

It's mostly because I haven't been spanked in over a week. Some friends of ours decided to drive to their beach house for the week, and invited us to go along. It was all very last minute and things were hectic the few days before we left. It was all worth it; we had a fantastic time. But we could not keep to our normal spanking schedule.

So I know it's coming and I have no interest in being spanked at all. When I have a week off, it's always so hard for me to get back into things.

Tonight is pussy spanking night too. I know we both need that. We've not been able to connect intimately in ages. It seems like it's always something. I hurt or J hurts, or people are around, or there's no time, or we're too tired. Just so many things. I think the intimacy of a pussy spanking will do us some good.

Sarah Silverman a spanko?

J and I were watching Dave Letterman the other night and Sarah Silverman said she gets spanked by her boyfriend! She says he left a hand shaped bruise on her tushie.

You can watch it here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4evrd5r--w

Skipped a day

On Monday I asked J if we could skip my appointment. I've been stressed out the past few weeks and I felt like I needed a break that day. I didn't think I was in a good place, mentally or emotionally to take a spanking. J was ok with that, but said we would resume on Wednesday.

Wednesday was today and I still wasn't exactly into the idea of getting spanked, but I no longer felt like it would be emotionally bad for me like I did the other day. J asked me if I have been feeling motivated and I said no. So he asked if we should go back to every day spankings. I said definitely No!

J assured me that even though I might not be into this right now, he is going to make sure to keep up with it. Every other time we would have stopped and gotten out of the routine of spanking. And after a short time we would both be wishing we never stopped. He said this time he's not going to allow that to happen.

My J is so strong and takes such good care of me. He has been the best husband in so many ways, but lately his will to be consistent has been shining through. Hopefully that will help get me through the times when I am not interested in being spanked!

The Puppy Papers

I recently mentioned that I was reading The Puppy Papers. I just finished it tonight.

This book consists of emails between Sharon (puppy) and Steven (the Dom). As the book goes on, they're mostly just Sharon's emails to Steven. He doesn't always respond (or he just didn't publish his responses).

Steven is a very experienced Dom and is also involved in the porn business. Sharon has limited experience, but is very eager to learn.

Right away Steven stresses the importance of compassion, trust, and respect. He's also quick to state that even when he's in complete control, he is aware of his sub's headspace and safety. These are things I can appreciate that I think are important in any relationship.

Sharon is self aware and seems to be able to put her feelings into words that are relatable. She's very honest about what she wants and who she is. She is very willing to explore and learn about herself and about being a sub. She has no conflict or guilt, about what she feels, just an overwhelming desire for completeness. She says she communicates better through writing than she does in person, which is something I can relate to, as I do the same thing,

As the relationship progresses it seems like Sharon starts pushing for more of a permanent thing, but she tries to be subtle about it. She often drops hints, like saying how much she wishes they could spend more time together and she wants to serve him more often. She also mentions she'd like to serve him 24/7. He rarely returns a comment when she mentions it.

The book does insinuate bestiality, which is not something I'm into. She doesn't go into any detail about it though, so it didn't turn me off of the book.

There were times when I thought some of the stories of Sharon's past might be exaggerations, but then I think of my own life and realized I did some crazy shit when I was younger. Even dangerous things that now I can't believe I did, so it's possible it's all true.

I'd recommend the book if it's a subject you are interested in. Being all emails, it's an easy book to read. I was able to get through it pretty quickly (when I could find time to actually sit down and read).

Communication

This is the latest post on Submissive Journal Prompts
http://www.submissiveguide.com/journalprompts/

"How does your owner expect you to communicate when you are angry/upset?"

In my case I don't have an owner, but I do have a dominant husband. And he expects full honesty and open communication. Which works out great for me, not only do I value honesty, but I also tend to be blunt and uncensored sometimes.

Thankfully J and I haven't had to deal with any distrust or jealousy issues, and our communication has never been a problem. It's one of the reasons our version of DD works so well for us.

I'm nearing the end of The Puppy Papers by Puppy Sharon & Steven Toushin. I should have a report for you in the next few days.

The Puppy Papers

I recently started a new book called The Puppy Papers by Puppy Sharon & Steven Toushin. I just started it, so I don't have much to say yet.

This is the description from the back of the book:
This unique and honest story traces one middle American woman’s journey into kinky sex. After 18 years of trying to be the perfect wife, mother, church member, friend, and professional, she realizes something big is missing in her life. With a few strokes of the keyboard, she stumbles into the amazing sexual hunting grounds of the Internet, falling with eyes open into the world of adult personal ads.

As only a puppy can, she eagerly jumps into BDSM on her first real-time encounter, meeting the man who becomes her first master. With that initial taste of kinky sex, a desire that laid dormant for many years came alive so strong that there was no going back. Beginning with the man she first called master, puppy embarked upon a search for her true Master. This book is the result of six months of e-mail correspondence with her current Master, that began as He desired to know her better.

Since puppy is a quiet woman around her Master, it was only through the written word that her story emerged, eventually taking on a life of its own. puppy’s story includes memories of herself as a little girl learning about her body, her sexual awakenings in her teen years, and the maturing of her libidinal desires. There is no conflict or guilt in puppy’s story, just an overwhelming desire for completeness.

In other news, I have been going to the gym according to the schedule J has set for me, so I've avoided being grounded so far.

I've also been motivated enough to complete my to-do list every day. I even started spring cleaning and have done many extra chores. And J and I are finally going to paint the office this weekend. I'm excited to pick a new color; the current paint is dingy and dull.

Spring is here!

Grounded?

Last night I was complaining again about the fact that I keep skipping the gym. J was tired of hearing it, and he announced that I would be going back to the gym starting today, and if I don't he will ground me. When he said that, my initial response was disbelief. Ground me? Those were words I hadn't heard since I was a teenager. It sounded so weird coming from my husband.

J let me know that yes, I will be grounded if I don't get back into a gym routine. I didn't ask too many questions, but he did specify that I would be grounded from the computer, as well as getting an early bedtime. I don't know if the grounding would also include TV, phone, going out, things like that. I also don't know how long I'd be grounded for - an hour? A day? A week? I am hoping I won't find out. Being grounded would put a serious wrinkle in my day to day activities.

J's right though, without any consequences I get lazy and skip the gym. And then he has to listen to me complain about not having any energy and feeling flabby. And it's no fun to listen to someone complain about something they can easily fix.

I haven't gone yet, but I still have plenty of time. We are lucky to have a 24 hour gym, so I can still fit in a workout later this evening.

Unfinished List

For the first time in a long time, I didn't finish my to do list. I knew I'd be getting a spanking when J got home from work. I was not looking forward to it. I feel like I've been spanked a lot this week. Plus I was already scheduled to receive a reminder/maintenance spanking tonight.

For my punishment, J used the big, long wooden paddle. The one I hate the most. He gave me 2 swats on each cheek (one for each item not completed on my to do list). I didn't exactly cry, but it did bring tears to my eyes. That paddle really hurts!

A few hours later, during my reminder spanking, J let me know that he won't hesitate to spank me every day if he thinks it will help me remember to get my list completed. I immediately said "No Way!" Three times a week is enough.

Once all of that was out of the way, we had a nice start to the weekend. We had a fun time running some errands, then we spent the rest of the night cuddling and watching movies. I felt very relaxed and loved.

Happy weekend!

Bedtime Blow Job

I was feeling a bit grumpy last night at bedtime when J wanted a blow job. I said I didn't feel like it and whined about it. J does not like whining. At all. He immediately rolled me over and spanked my pussy. He reminded me that I am not allowed to tell him no. He also reminded me that the punishment for whining is getting a dick in my mouth. J feels that if I am whining, he will give me something else to occupy my mouth with. Sometimes he uses the cock gag, most times he uses his own cock.

The pussy spanking was short, but very stingy. J made sure to spank most of my very sensitive areas. He was having a bit of trouble holding open my lips to spank my clit, because of the position we were in. For a second I thought he was going to ask me to hold them open, but thankfully he didn't. I'm not sure that I would be able to actually do that knowing how much it hurts.

When J was done spanking my pussy, he guided my head down to his cock and fucked my face until he was satisfied.

My whining was pointless. All it got me was a pussy spanking. Sometimes I just can't help myself.

Why domestic discipline is not domestic violence.

I recently read this blog post by Natty over at The Punishment Book about why domestic discipline is not domestic violence.

I like how the post points out very clearly how the two are not even remotely connected. The biggest, most glaring difference is consent. There is no consent with abuse, and it is largely based on manipulation. With DD there is consent and honesty. At least there is in our household.

If you have a minute, go read Natty's great post on the subject.

The whole blog

I just re-read the whole blog from the beginning. It was interesting to see what I was feeling a couple of years ago. I'm happy J and I have been able to progress in this aspect of our relationship. We're both much better at it now, especially the consistency part of it. I give J all the credit for that. He has not let us slide back into laziness when it comes to our spanking schedule and other aspects of our version of DD. I'm not sure it will ever sound "normal" for me to say I have a spanking schedule.

Even with the spankings, I sometimes find myself sitting here staring at my list, feeling lazy, wondering if it would be worth it just to get spanked. At the end of every day it seems like I have that one thing on my to do list that I just do not feel like doing. I think to myself, "I could just not do it." But then I think of how it feels to be spanked as a punishment. Most of the time, I ultimately complete my to do list. Maybe that means the reminder spankings are working.

Bent over the chair

Tonight was just like any other night when I decided to ask J, "Are we having our appointment today?"

He looked over at me, surprised, "Why wouldn't we?"

"I don't know. I just don't feel like it."

Without hesitation J commanded, "Stand up."

I did as instructed.

J guided me over the chair, pulled my pants down and started spanking with quick, sharp swats. After just a few minutes, he pulled my pants back up and stood me up again.

He then told me to get on my knees, which I did quickly. He guided my head down to his cock. After he came, he told me we could cancel the reminder spanking.

I guess that was one way to tell me. ha. ha.

Submissive Journal Prompts

I've been having some trouble coming up with things to write about. I feel like I'm writing about the same spanking over and over. So, I did some searching online for some ideas awhile back and I came across this site. I forgot about it until today when I was going through some old bookmarks. It's called Submissive Journal Prompts: http://www.submissiveguide.com/journalprompts/

The prompt today is about blogging and it says this: "If you have an online blog, this would be a good week to reintroduce yourself to your readers." So that's what I thought I would do.

My name is Cassady and I'm a spanko. I've had an interest in spanking for as long as I can remember, but it was always a sexual thing. Over the years I've been able to find tons of information, thanks to the Internet, about spanking, different lifestyles, BDSM, DD, and many other things that interest me. When I met J he had never spanked anyone. He is a gentle soul, and I was afraid he wouldn't be able to step into any sort of dominant role. But if you've been reading this blog you know he is a natural.

We've taken aspects from different schools of thought, and have found things we really like and that work well for us. We have stopped and started trying to live our own version of DD many times. Somehow it seems like we stop for a specific reason (house guests, illness, laziness, etc.) and never start back up again. But we are both happier when we could keep up with it. This last time we started, we both decided we would make a commitment to make it a priority. And so far that's been working out great.

I get regular spankings 3 times a week. We usually call them reminder spankings because the purpose is to remind me to finish my to-do list every day, stay motivated, and submit to J. It also reminds me what the consequences are of not doing those things. I also get weekly pussy spankings. This further aids in my submissiveness.

This is all done with my permission and at my request. J is so very loving and attentive, I could never dream of someone else I'd want to be married to. And he cares enough to discipline me when I need it.

Feel free to introduce yourself in the comments or send me an email.

Pussy Punishment

J and I had a very nice, relaxing weekend where we got to spend a lot of time just being together. There was one point where I was a bit of a brat and wouldn't expose my tits when J asked. He reminded me that was a no no and asked if I wanted my pussy spanked. Of course I said no.

Since he didn't spank me right then, I figured the incident had been forgotten about, but tonight after my regular reminder spanking, J told me to flip over onto my back. He reminded me that I was due a punishment spanking on my pussy for refusing him this weekend.

He whipped my pussy with a small strap, while lecturing me on whose pussy it is and how I agreed to submit to him. This was my first pussy punishment and I thought it would be a lot worse. When I get my ass spanked for punishment it's way worse than a reminder spanking. But the pussy punishment was not nearly as bad as the weekly reminders I get. Although at one point he spread my lips wide and was spanking directly on my clit. That hurt a lot.

J then started using his thumb to play with my clit during the spanking. He was doing both at the same time. I asked him why he was making me feel good, when it was supposed to hurt, but he said I shouldn't tell him how to play with his toy. He's right, so I didn't object further. Overall it felt more like a game than a serious spanking.

He didn't let me cum at that time, and the spanking didn't last very long. When it was over, we cuddled for a few minutes. It always feels so right being in his arms.

I'm quite happy with the way we've been progressing and keeping up with our version of DD. Every other time we've tried it, we ended up stopping and months would go by before we'd start again. J has been great about maintaining consistency and a level of strictness. He doesn't let me get away with much. For the most part I get my things done every day and don't get punished very often. And that definitely feels good.

Many implements

I came into the bedroom and saw all of these implements laying out on the bed.



I knew tonight I was going to be spanked on my ass and also on my pussy. For various reasons that seemed to happen one right after the other, it has been a long time since I've had my pussy spanked.

I was first told to lay on my stomach. J sat next to me on the bed and began to spank me with his hand. He switched on and off with the strap, ruler, and other implements pictured above. At one point he spanked each cheek hard, very quickly, one right after the other. It seemed to go on forever. My ass was on fire.

We discussed the usual topics during the spanking. The reasons for the spanking, understanding the rules and consequences, if these reminder spankings help me get things done, and what I need to do to avoid punishment.

Once that was over he had me flip onto my back. He started right in, using his hand at first. He also used one of the small leather slappers. J lectured me more than usual tonight during my pussy spanking. He was very stern. I felt like he was in a very strict mode and I also felt like he would not abuse that role and he would take care of me. He thoroughly spanked my pussy and lips. He even spanked inside my lips, on the very sensitive part. He used the ruler on my pussy and also on my nipples. It stung and I know I squirmed a lot.

I feel very submissive immediately after a pussy spanking. I guess that's the idea. Thing is, it wears off pretty quickly. The submissive feeling. Not totally, but mostly.

Tonight, right after my spanking, J did an inspection of my pussy. He checked to make sure there were no marks or bruising. I feel so exposed when he does his examinations.

He then started playing with my clit. At one point I asked him to move his thumb to a different position. He asked me if I was trying to tell him how to play with his toy. And he said, "Didn't we just talk about whose toy this is?" Yes, yes, we did.

I was close to cuming, but he stopped and said that wasn't the time for that. I hopped in the shower and thought about finishing myself off, but I wasn't sure if I should. We have no set rule about me cuming. Generally I just cum whenever I want. So I thought I would wait and mention it later. When I did J said I could use my favorite toy tonight to come before I go to bed. I am looking forward to that. I couldn't wait though. Just a little while ago I used my hand while still in the office. I just couldn't wait for the release.

Velcro Underwear

I was punished again today for not completing an item on my to do list. It's nearly always the same item - not practicing my guitar. I really do want to play the guitar, I just hate the practicing and learning part. I get so frustrated when I can do it perfectly right away. So I didn't do it yesterday and J spanked me for it. I got several really hard swats with the strap before he continued spanking me for my regular reminder spanking. At one point J pulled my ass cheek to one side and spanked the inner part. I can't recall if he's ever done that before. It stung!

I worked on an interesting project today. Awhile back I read somewhere that a man made his wife wear underwear with velcro on the inside anytime she received a spanking. Mostly it was for when she got spanked as a reminder right before they went out somewhere, she'd wear this special underwear so that anytime she moved, the rough part of the velcro rubbed on her already hurting ass. It was to serve as a constant reminder throughout the night.

Well I've never seen any velcro underwear for sale anywhere, so J asked me to make some. I took a pair of my own underwear and bought enough velcro to cover the back part AND the front part. This was also J's idea. That way when I am required to wear it, it will rub on my ass and my pussy. I just finished it today, so I haven't had a chance to wear it yet. I'm hoping I don't have to wear it for a long time, because it looks very uncomfortable. When I am eventually required to wear it, I'll be sure to blog about it.

Punished Again!

I don't know what it is with me, but anytime there is anything different in my schedule (like J gets home from work early, or I am not here when he gets home, etc.) I forget to show him my completed to do list.

I forgot again today and J had to ask me for it. After I showed him the list, he reminded me that I am to show him the list every day when he gets home from work. He led me into the bedroom, pulled my pants down, and had me lay on my stomach on the bed.

We recently got some new implements and J decided to use this new one today:



It's essentially just a belt sewn together at the end. J says it gives him a good amount of control when he swings it.

It feels just like any other belt and it stings. I felt more defiant today, and slightly irritated. It's sometimes hard to see what the big deal is. My list was all finished, so that should be that. But J's point is that he doesn't know it's done if he doesn't see it, with everything all checked off.

The spanking wasn't very long, but he lectured me the whole time. He finished up with a few really hard swats to my ass with his hand. Then it was over.

Tomorrow I will remember...

The Scorpion's Sweet Venom

I have been feeling unwell again, so J and I have not been playing at all. I have been getting my regular reminder spankings, but even they have been brief. I am anxious to get over this sinus infection, and severe skin dryness, and cramps, and get back to our regular fun!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few days ago I mentioned a book I was reading "The Scorpion's Sweet Venom" by Bruna Surfistinha. It was a quick read and I just finished it last night.

The book starts with some background info about Raquel, the author. She's adopted and her family is wealthy. She is constantly seeking to push limits and find adventure. She doesn't exactly feel love from her family and at 17 decides to go out on her own. She very willingly becomes a prostitute and lives by her own rules.

She takes on the name Bruna, and in the book she switches between her reality as Raquel and her reality as Bruna.

She is successful at her job and mostly enjoys her work. She makes interesting observations about her clients. She decides to start a blog as an outlet and it becomes very popular, landing her in magazine and television interviews.

She gives a lot of pointers in her book about what people really want sexually but are too afraid to ask their partners.

She sets a financial goal for herself and when she reaches it, her plan is to get out of prostitution and go back to school for psychology. She seems to be very strong and level headed.

She does meet her goals and leaves prostitution. Her plan was to keep up with her blog, but it is an invalid link, now, so I guess she didn't.

I wouldn't call it a great book, but it was very interesting and I would recommend it to anyone who has an interest in her story. I like the way she seems so sure of herself, even when she's faced with an unsure situation. She seems to be easily able to separate sex and love, which is something I can appreciate.

Forgotten List

I again forgot to show J my completed to-do list on Friday. I don't know why I keep forgetting. This is the 3rd time. I didn't remember until I was already bent over on the bed, with my pants off for my regular Friday reminder spanking.

J said, "Did you forget to do something today?"

At first I didn't know what he was talking about. And then it dawned on me!
I quietly said, "I didn't show you my list."

I got a short lecture and 4 really hard swats with the strap, in addition to my regular reminder spanking. During the lecture J told me he wanted me to journal about forgetting to show him my list, when I get spanked for it, why, and how I felt.

I don't know if he meant for me to do it on the blog or not, but that's where I'm doing it.

January 29th - Today I was spanked because I forgot to show J my to do list.
I felt shocked at first, I was in disbelief that I had forgotten anything. I've been really good at finishing my list. But once I realized I had forgotten to show J, I felt disappointed in myself. I had forgotten again. J asks me how will he know if I have completed my list or not unless I show it to him?

The spanking hurt and I may have yelped once or twice, but I didn't cry. I never do. J led me to the corner and told me to stand there and think about how I'm going to remember to show him my list every day. I'm still not sure exactly how I'm going to remember, but I hope I do!

Later in the evening I made the mistake of whining. J abhors whining. He always tells me he will find something else to put in my mouth. So after about 30 seconds of whining, I found myself on my knees with J's dick in my mouth. He's done this before and usually only has me suck him off for a few minutes, but last night he had me suck him until he came. In the past he has also made me wear a cock gag for whining. He really doesn't like to hear whining.

J has been on a toy buying spree the past week or so. He ordered a bunch of new stuff. The skirt is the only thing that has arrived so far. We are waiting on several slapper type paddles, and some other stuff. I'll post pictures as things arrive.

I'm not quite sure what he's up to with the new toys, but the theme seems to be "things to slap my pussy with". A lot of these new toys are things that will make me feel very submissive and that's something J has been paying a bit more attention to, lately. I feel like I might be headed for a bit of sub-type training in the near future. I am partially excited and partially terrified. I sometimes get very anxious if I feel that I'm not in control. But once I get past that, it's something that makes me feel good in the end.

Not having had my pussy spanked in so long; I am really feeling like something is missing. Not like there's some big flaw in our relationship or anything...more like the very deep level we connect on is just slightly less deep. It's due to some girlie issues I've been having that have prevented us from playing much and I think that's really what I'm missing. Hopefully I will be back to normal soon.

New skirt!

Do you ever say you need a spanking, and then once you're being spanked you realize you were completely wrong and you didn't need a spanking after all? That's how I felt today. I think J is feeling back into the swing of things this week, as my spanking felt more real than it has for awhile.

J ordered a skirt for me to wear once the weather gets warmer. I think he will have me wear it when I am doing certain household tasks, or maybe after spankings, I'm not sure yet. Here is a picture of it.



I started reading the book I mentioned the other night - The Scorpion's Sweet Venom. I am only a few pages in, but so far I like it. She writes as 2 people - her real self and her prostitute self. I like the way she uses a different font for each story.

I Need a spanking

I'm glad it's Monday. My spanking schedule has been intermittent for the past couple of weeks. I've been sick off and on, and for some reason I always felt worse after a spanking. So J stopped them for all of last week. And pussy spankings haven't happened in 2 or 3 weeks.

I'm feeling mostly better now, so I am getting a spanking tonight. And I really feel like I need one. One day last week I didn't complete my to do list. I just didn't really care about it. Partly it was because I wasn't feeling well and partly it was because I knew there'd be no immediate consequence. At the time J did say we will discuss it next week.

I hate admitting that I *need* to be spanked, but my motivation slips away so quickly without regular physical reminders. I keep thinking that one of these days we will decrease the reminder spankings to maybe 2 days a week or maybe even once a week, like we once did. But it seems like as long as 3 days a week keep working, J is going to stick with that schedule.

I probably won't get a pussy spanking this week, but those will resume next week. I am feeling like I need one of those too. I haven't felt very submissive or sexual lately. Again it's partly because I am unwell, but it's also because we haven't had that connection in awhile. J has mentioned that he can tell I am in need of one.

I just got a new book. It's called "The Scorpion's Sweet Venom: The Diary of a Brazilian Call Girl" by Bruna Surfistinha. Part memoir, part cautionary tale, part sex guide, Bruna brings to life the raw, desperate and dangerous underbelly of the Brazilian sex trade, and shares outrageous advice for the bedroom, like what men really want but are too afraid to ask. Provocative, seductive and unforgettable, The Scorpion’s Sweet Venom is the vivid account of a young girl’s life on the street, and a fearless expression of human sexuality.

I'll post a review after I read it. Anyone else reading anything?

Motivation & Consequences

J and I talked about consequences tonight. Well he mostly talked (and spanked) and I mostly listened. J asked me if I feel more motivated. I'm not sure motivated is the right word, but I definitely make sure my things are done every day.

I notice that when I'm thinking about not completing my to do list, my first thought is that I know I'll get spanked for it. I say things to myself like, "It won't be so bad." But I've not yet had a punishment spanking since the most recent time we started our version of DD. I know the maintenance spankings are pretty bad, I don't really want to know what a more severe spanking would be like.

Ultimately I decide to complete my list and not find out what a punishment spanking would be like.

I haven't had any corner time in a few weeks. The corner we normally use has been occupied by some boxes of stuff that we need to move to storage. So J has been skipping that part. I can't say I feel any differently about things without the corner time. I know it's supposed to be time to reflect, but I usually just stand there, bored and wondering how much longer I have to stand there. So I haven't missed it.

Since we are talking about corner time, I thought I would comment on another section from the article of unknown origin. (AG = Article Guy)

AG is a big fan of corner time. He requires his wife to be nude while in the corner, which is essentially what J does. Although J does let me wear a robe (untied) if I am chilly.

AG says the minimum amount of corner time should be 10-15 minutes for maintenance, and 20-30 for punishments. J usually only makes me stand in the corner for 5 minutes or less. I get bored standing there and usually my mind drifts to other things that aren't related to the spanking I just received.

AG's reasoning for the length of time is that he says there are cycles of thought. He says his wife might first go through boredom and anger, and only after that will she be able to focus on what got her put in the corner. I definitely get the boredom thing, but I'm not sure I'd ever feel angry.

AG says it is "more effective if you physically place your wife in the corner". I would agree with that. There's something more dominant about J leading me to and placing me in the corner. The same with removing me from the corner when my time is up.

I'm sure if I was getting a punishment spanking, J would require me to stand in the corner for a longer period of time. But let's hope I don't find out anytime soon!

I hope you all have a good weekend and try not to get in trouble!

Submission

I really notice a difference in my submission level when I am pussy spanked. It had been a few weeks since the last one and I've felt a little more disconnected in the submission part of my relationship with J.

But after Wednesday's spanking, I feel more of a desire to please J and I feel somehow more...protected? I don't know if that's the right word to use. I guess there's a sort of security feeling I get when J is taking care of me. And when I know J is filling my needs, I'm more wanting to fill his.

The spanking itself was relatively mild compared to others I've had. I've been having some dry skin troubles around my legs, and J was careful not to spank there (he sometimes spanks my inner thighs when I'm receiving a pussy spanking). But it still had the desired effect.

Sometimes when J spreads my lips and spanks, I am afraid it will hurt so much that I won't be able to handle it. But every time J knows just how to do it perfectly, and he never damages me, physically or emotionally. It's an amazing feeling to be able to put that much trust in someone.