Friday, November 9, 2012

Wearing the Collar


This was a text between J and I today.

me: Do you have an outfit preference for tonight?

J: same as yesterday but with your collar.
me:  ok
J:  In fact, your collar should go on as soon as you wake up.

Well that's new.  


This week has been full of new things for J and I. I've been meaning to blog about it, but have been so wrapped up in J.  


He has been commanding and dominant and strict, and I have been making an effort to try to go with it and step out of my comfort zone from time to time. It's been fun and exciting and scary and uncomfortable all at the same time. I always go through many emotions when fantasy becomes reality.

I have been dressing (or undressing) for J and greeting him when he gets home from work.  The anticipation of him getting home and the process of getting ready to present myself to him in a way he will love, has been energizing.  I have been wearing a collar when in J's presence, but I guess tomorrow that will be changing to all day.  I have to find out what he will say about taking off the collar to go out.


I have worn the collar once, in public, so far.  It was on a trip to the grocery store, with J, and I had a scarf on.  I'm pretty sure no one saw it, but it was nerve wracking.  It was also kind of thrilling at the same time.  I have no idea how I would explain it if I ran into someone I knew and they saw it.  

Monday, November 5, 2012

In Control



J has been so super horny the last few days, and he always acts more dominant and playful when he's like that. I think it's because he knows he doesn't have to travel as much in the next few weeks, and he's looking forward to the extra days at home.

We got to talk about all kinds of things this weekend and one of them was control. J says he really likes the control. I said I liked when he had control, too. I also told him how much I love pleasing and pleasuring him. 

We got to play a lot this weekend - we were like 2 teenagers! We haven't really had much time together lately so we were both a little pent up.

But there were also a few times where J was serious. He told me he wanted to work more on everything, including my submission to him. I agreed.

He kept me well spanked all weekend. He would just randomly spank me throughout the day. We would just be watching a movie or making lunch or something and he would gently guide me over his knee and spank me for a few quick minutes. During each spanking, he asked me if I was sure I wanted him to be in charge.  I said "yes".  He asked if I would stop fighting him on things I didn't want to do.  I said "yes", but that one is going to be hard. 

I know that normally if there's something I really don't want to do, J won't make me. He always gives in. But not this time. He said it's going to be different this time. (I do have a safe word, if it gets to be too much, though.)

An example is that he was telling me to do something and I was resisting.  

He said, "If you pull away again, I'm going to paddle you."
  
I later asked him if he really would have paddled me. He said "Absolutely."

Now that is different for him. He normally would have said no.  

He also told me to go do the dishes this morning, after breakfast. He has never said that before. He doesn't usually pay attention to my housekeeping skills (or lack thereof). I loved it.  I so much want to be a good housewife, always having all the chores done and always having a clean house.  The only reason I don't is because I get lazy. If J keeps on me to keep up with the dishes, vacuuming, dusting, etc... I'm much more likely to get them all done, and we'll both be happier.

I'm going to try really hard to just let go and go with it.  So far, it's been lots of fun.