Back on Schedule

So J told me today that it was time for me to get back on a schedule.

"What kind of schedule?"

He started with "6pm spanking"

I waited for him to say Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, because that was our schedule before.

But he continued with "every day."

Then he added, "We have a lot of catching up to do."

Eek! But he's right, I do need to get back on a regular schedule. Not just with spanking, but with everything else in my life, too. We got so busy this summer and got far away from schedules and rituals. I've been a total slacker with chores and daily tasks that need to be done.

I just can't seem to be productive unless I know there are definite consequences. Lucky for me, J is willing to provide those consequences.

We also agreed (long ago) that I would submit to J sexually. Anytime I "don't feel like it", J reminds me of our agreement. And every time, I'm glad I was reminded because I always enjoy it and feel happy that we did it. That may sound weird to some people, but it's just how I'm wired. (And I always have veto power over the whole thing if it's not working for me.)

J also added that to get me used to our arrangement, I'll be performing orally on him every day following my spanking.

I feel like J is more than ready to step back into his role of expecting me to do what I say I'm going to do, and providing the consequences when I don't. He can be strict sometimes, but it works for us.

I don't know if he's going to incorporate things like corner time, bedtimes, and other punishments back in. I expect he will. It feels like I haven't stood in a corner for eons. J didn't specifically mention pussy spankings either, but I think it's assumed that they will be resuming, as well.

I see so many relationships falling apart all around me, but J and I remain strong. I think a lot of it has to do with our version of DD. A lot of my friends don't seem to communicate very well with their spouses. J and I communicate clearly and openly all the time, and I attribute much of that to our version of DD.

I'm happy we found something that works great for us, even if we do stray away from it sometimes.

Grounded?

Last night I was complaining again about the fact that I keep skipping the gym. J was tired of hearing it, and he announced that I would be going back to the gym starting today, and if I don't he will ground me. When he said that, my initial response was disbelief. Ground me? Those were words I hadn't heard since I was a teenager. It sounded so weird coming from my husband.

J let me know that yes, I will be grounded if I don't get back into a gym routine. I didn't ask too many questions, but he did specify that I would be grounded from the computer, as well as getting an early bedtime. I don't know if the grounding would also include TV, phone, going out, things like that. I also don't know how long I'd be grounded for - an hour? A day? A week? I am hoping I won't find out. Being grounded would put a serious wrinkle in my day to day activities.

J's right though, without any consequences I get lazy and skip the gym. And then he has to listen to me complain about not having any energy and feeling flabby. And it's no fun to listen to someone complain about something they can easily fix.

I haven't gone yet, but I still have plenty of time. We are lucky to have a 24 hour gym, so I can still fit in a workout later this evening.

Motivation & Consequences

J and I talked about consequences tonight. Well he mostly talked (and spanked) and I mostly listened. J asked me if I feel more motivated. I'm not sure motivated is the right word, but I definitely make sure my things are done every day.

I notice that when I'm thinking about not completing my to do list, my first thought is that I know I'll get spanked for it. I say things to myself like, "It won't be so bad." But I've not yet had a punishment spanking since the most recent time we started our version of DD. I know the maintenance spankings are pretty bad, I don't really want to know what a more severe spanking would be like.

Ultimately I decide to complete my list and not find out what a punishment spanking would be like.

I haven't had any corner time in a few weeks. The corner we normally use has been occupied by some boxes of stuff that we need to move to storage. So J has been skipping that part. I can't say I feel any differently about things without the corner time. I know it's supposed to be time to reflect, but I usually just stand there, bored and wondering how much longer I have to stand there. So I haven't missed it.

Since we are talking about corner time, I thought I would comment on another section from the article of unknown origin. (AG = Article Guy)

AG is a big fan of corner time. He requires his wife to be nude while in the corner, which is essentially what J does. Although J does let me wear a robe (untied) if I am chilly.

AG says the minimum amount of corner time should be 10-15 minutes for maintenance, and 20-30 for punishments. J usually only makes me stand in the corner for 5 minutes or less. I get bored standing there and usually my mind drifts to other things that aren't related to the spanking I just received.

AG's reasoning for the length of time is that he says there are cycles of thought. He says his wife might first go through boredom and anger, and only after that will she be able to focus on what got her put in the corner. I definitely get the boredom thing, but I'm not sure I'd ever feel angry.

AG says it is "more effective if you physically place your wife in the corner". I would agree with that. There's something more dominant about J leading me to and placing me in the corner. The same with removing me from the corner when my time is up.

I'm sure if I was getting a punishment spanking, J would require me to stand in the corner for a longer period of time. But let's hope I don't find out anytime soon!

I hope you all have a good weekend and try not to get in trouble!

Thanksgiving and getting back into the routine

Our DD activities kind of fell apart last week with the holidays; having houseguests and later being houseguests. We had a great time celebrating with friends and family, though.

As I was making up my weekly to do list on Sunday, J told me to make sure I had our 3 appointments on there. Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. With the Wednesday one including a pussy spanking. I didn't get that last week and even though I don't like it, I still missed it.

It's incredible to me how much being held accountable does for me. This past week I barely got the things done I needed to do. It was a real struggle for me. It was almost like I knew there would be no consequences, so I didn't make the effort. It's just so much easier to be lazy and focus my attention elsewhere.

We were watching The Biggest Loser on our DVR over the weekend, and I found myself wondering: If those people had consequences like spanking, would they be more inclined to exercise/eat right? I'd like to see Bob and Jillian with a paddle!

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Here is some more from the article of unknown origin that I have been commenting on. (AG = Article Guy)

Another thing the AG talks about is Grounding. This is one of those areas that I am conflicted about. When I honestly think about it, there are times when I spend too much time on the computer, and shirk my responsibilities. That seems like an offense ideal for grounding.

But would I get angry and resent J for grounding me? Or would I ignore the grounding? I'm not really sure as I've never actually been grounded, for real. AG restricts his wife from TV, Internet, phone, and leaving the house when she is grounded. The length of time depends on her offense. Anywhere from several hours to several days. I can't even imagine being restricted from doing something I want to do for several days.

AG says grounding is very effective on his wife, and that he doesn't have to do it often. If J decides I need to be grounded at some point, I will be sure to blog about how I dealt with it.

A new kind of maintenance

For my Friday maintenance J decided to use a leather strap and a wooden ruler, in addition to his hand. Throughout the spanking he asked me to tell him what I wanted to accomplish and repeated to me that the three times a week maintenance has really been helping me. In fact I got my whole to do list finished every day this week. I was spanked a little bit harder and a bit longer today. J says it is to make sure I can remember it all weekend, since I won't be spanked again until Monday (unless I earn a punishment or something).

I do love that I feel a bit more motivated to get things done, but I've got to say my butt is sore! Three times a week is definitely a solid reminder of what I need to get done. The soreness doesn't really have time to go away, so I am being reminded every time I sit or move around in a way that brushes my undies against my ass.

Today is a perfect example of how it seems to be working for me. There was an item on my to do list that I was not particularly looking forward to. My first thought was that I will just put it off until tomorrow. The longer I sat here with my to do list staring at me, the more I felt that I really should get that thing done. One because I really didn't want to be spanked again on my already sore bottom. Also, I knew that J would be disappointed if I didn't complete my whole list today, especially after receiving 3 maintenance spankings. So I did it and now I feel happy that my list is completed!

We discussed something new tonight and that is pussy maintenance. We agreed a long time ago that I would never turn J down for sex, unless I am unwell or injured. The only reason I ever turn him down is pure laziness. I get to where I just "don't feel like it". When I do it anyway, I always end up enjoying it and having a great time. It ALWAYS feels good. So we decided that I would no longer be allowed to deny his advances. If/when I do J is supposed to spank my pussy as punishment. Then, sometime later in the day we would have sex. J likes to leave time in between punishment and sex so that the two don't get confused. He says the sex is not part of the punishment.

So, we were discussing how my three times weekly maintenance has been helping with my motivation; giving me the reminder I need of what the consequences will be for not completing my list. J said why not the same with pussy maintenance? It will be a reminder of what happens if I deny his advances. We haven't yet worked out a schedule, J might incorporate it into my already scheduled Mon/Wed/Fri maintenance spankings.

This afternoon, J instructed me into the bedroom. He laid me on my back and whipped my pussy with a riding crop, his hand, and a ruler. He didn't use much force, I think he was just trying to get the feel of how he's going to do this. He also whipped my breasts with the crop. It stung a bit, but he kept it fairly light. He spanked my pussy with varying levels of intensity, at first I found myself getting turned on. But once the intensity increased, I could feel the horniness fading away, and the seriousness of the punishment took its place. It wasn't really a punishment; it was more of a practice for what's to come.

At one point I started to whine a little bit, so J got the cock gag we have and placed it in my mouth. It's short, but very wide. My jaw instantly ached from it. I used to be able to hold that thing in my mouth for awhile, now it because painful after just a few minutes. I am WAY out of practice.

I think the pussy maintenance is promising and necessary to our fantastic sex life. When we first met, I was jumping J's bones constantly. Now I just feel lazy so often that I don't want to bother. I can't wait for that to change.

Jumping right in

My husband, J and I have tried unsuccessfully to create our version of a domestic discipline/LDD/CDD/whatever-you-want-to-call-it lifestyle. We've taken parts we like from different "schools of thought", and have found things we really like. But for some reason, we never stick with it.

This time it feels different, more real. I didn't try to tell him what to do this time, I let him take the reigns. We're not trying to lay out rules and charts and schedules this time. We're just going to take it day by day and see where it takes us. It feels more natural than ever before this time.

We started on Monday. J informed me I would be spanked at 6:15 that evening. The reason for this spanking was to get me back into the swing of things. I had gotten quite lazy lately. I love a clean house, but when I get lazy I don't clean much. I hate this about me. J is trying to help me with that. When I get regular spankings, I am much more motivated to get things clean. Later I get to reap the benefits of a nice clean house, and I am so happy I cleaned it.

These regular spankings also help me remember there are consequences for my actions. There is a certain way I talk to people sometimes that J hates. I hate it too, but I rarely notice I'm even doing it. When I do it, J will spank me or discipline me in another way. I find that I use that negative tone less and less. The regular spankings help me remember I am held accountable for my actions and the way I conduct myself. It is a feeling I love.

I realize this lifestyle is not for everyone, but it is definitely for me.

I have been thinking about starting a blog for awhile. I think it will be a good way for me to express myself, and writing is something I enjoy.