Anticipation

Sometimes, when I'm sitting here, waiting for a spanking, I can feel the anticipation building. I know that I am going to be spanked when J gets home from work. He will be home in less than an hour. I know I won't be able to talk my way out of it or somehow otherwise distract J from his task.

Depending on my mood, I sometimes feel turned on by the anticipation. Other times I feel irritated and grumpy. And other times I feel thankful and well taken care of. Overall, this spanking schedule we've been keeping has had a positive affect on us. So no matter what kind of mood I'm in, I submit to the spanking.

...LATER...

So I'm writing this part after having just been spanked. J tells me I'm doing great with my errands/chores. I've been making a daily to do list and have completed it every day. I'm also doing well with not using that tone that J hates. I've been coming to bed on time each night, too. But the one thing I haven't been so great with is being submissive (both sexually and not). J really wants to work on that this week.

It's not that I'm completely unsubmissive, I just have had a low sex drive and have been a bit on the grumpy side lately. Part of it is laziness and part of it is letting myself get back out of shape again. I always feel crappy when I don't exercise regularly. So that's the other thing J brought up tonight. He wants me to start going back to the gym. And he decided that he'll go with me to get himself in better shape, too. He says if I don't go, he won't go either, (although if I don't go, I'll get spanked!).

J is in the garage right now putting a final stain on the ruler. My punishment for not being submissive is a spanking on my pussy with the ruler. It's a heavy wooden ruler that J sanded and stained, so it will look nice and not leave any splinters or anything. We haven't actually used it yet, though it's come up in conversation a bunch of times over the past couple of weeks.

I'm a little nervous about the ruler. I've never been spanked on my pussy other than for play. I've never had an actual frontal punishment. I know it is supposed to hurt, and that's what makes me nervous. I think I'm going to be seeing a lot of this ruler in the near future.

If this posting (and my other postings) seems choppy, it's because sometimes I write things throughout the day, as I think of them. I wait to post them until I have some time to type them all out into the blog.

Thanks for reading!